I went down, down into my subconsciousness.
At first all the trivial stuff bubbled to the surface-how much I hated my last flat mate, the job details at work which I'm sure I never sent out, paying my electric bill and other insignificant earth based conversations.
Then I moved a layer down to the chamber of doors.
I went to the first door and opened it. All my lovers were inside -sitting as though waiting for an event-similar to a school classroom. I thought they looked a right motley crew. (Mental note: must choose better calibre of lovers). Two lovers were missing and then they appeared. They were the two that I had been in love with. One was more beautiful than the other in my eyes. I set all my lovers free, bar the one that was more beautiful, and let them continue in their earth bound lives, with partners, children and common everyday things. I did not keep the one that was more beautiful in the room but he was not relinquished either.
The next door-my father. He was sitting with his head in his hands bereft. I went up to him and held him as the woman I am now, not as the girl I was when he died. He was still the same age. I healed his wounds with a laser like pen that instantly healed the skin-like in a sci-fi movie. I washed his feet, gave him new clothes and provided a new home on a hill. The house was warm and full of everything he needed. I gave him Josephine his wife (she looked younger and healed of all earth bound ailments) they had a picnic in the sun and were blissfully happy. I said to Dad "you can go now-you are free."
The next-my potential lover-there was a multicoloured light in room, and he stood there like the Angel Michael. I could see and touch his wings. I gave gifts of jewels, gold and the like. Next we were in some sort of jungle-beautiful full of flora- he was showing me all the exotic plants -I was fascinated. We stood facing each other and he held my hands to his chest and kissed me lightly on both cheeks. I said " Can you come now, I need your protection." He said "Yes."
The next-me as a child. I held her, and kissed her, and cuddled her. She was so beautiful in my eyes and she nestled into my middle aged bosom-. I vowed to protect her and provide everything that she needed.
The next-I can't remember what was inside. Only that I was spiritually chained to something via the chest, by a sort of umbilical cord to some other intangible energy above and diagonally across from me, some distance away, not particularly horrible but something that needed severed. And it was severed.
The next-the darkness. I opened the door and saw Giger's cellar steps. I walked down them and was disappointed that my mind could only conjure a cavern with a dragon. I tried to re-think. In front of me the darkness came in a sheet. It was so dark and void. I closed the door and then instructed it to be soldered shut. But I needed more assurance. So the front of the door was covered in a putty like material and giant gem-stones were placed in rows across the door until it was entirely covered. My mind's eye could see behind the door and gold like drips bled horizontally defying gravity as the darkness tried to penetrate the door. Still unsure I placed a gold angel in front of the door. He stood with his arms folded. I was then satisfied I was safe.
I then tried to go a layer deeper below the chamber of doors.
Below was a dark yet magnificent tower against the wall, thousands of feet high. It was part of a city. I was hard to decipher-it was almost biomachine both technology, architecture and life form. It appeared to have a head at the top of the tower, eyes too. Not threatening, quite beautiful, but not benevolent exactly. Birds seemed to fly across the tower gliding in the airflow . I tried to clarify what I was seeing but it was too difficult to solidify.
......and so upwards,upwards.... and .....awake.
